May 15, 2008

  • It's Carlin, by George!

    My chat last year with George Carlin was (almost) the most fun I ever had with a telephone.

    From the Asbury Park Press, February, 16th 2007

    STILL CARLIN AFTER ALL THESE YEARS

    At 69, George Carlin still has something to say

    By Ed Kaz !

    Comedy Correspondent

    George Carlin never fit in.

    "I got kicked out of three schools and quit
    another one." reminisced the legendary comic who appears at the Strand
    in Lakewood this Thursday,  "And I had been kicked out of the Boy
    Scouts, the choir, the altar boys and summer camp all for various
    infractions."

    Indeed, Carlin was a born rule breaker.  With a
    compelling need to remain true to his art and to himself, he busted out
    of the dead end middle-class nightclub scene of the sixties and
    seventies, grew his hair and dove headlong into college campuses. 
    It was there that Carlin emerged as a counter-culture comedy
    icon.  Yet somehow he managed to enjoy mainstream success at the
    same time with such television stalwarts as Mike Douglas and Ed
    Sullivan.  It was truly a shizophrenic existence. 

    In 2007
    the culture has caught up with Carlin.  To attend his show today
    is not to be shocked and outraged; it's to simply enjoy an evening of
    hilariously rough-hewn observations of the stupid things we all
    encounter in our lives. 

    But don't get too comfortable; this is George Carlin, after all...

    KAZ:  You were on The Ed Sullivan Show eleven times!

    CARLIN:  Yep.

    KAZ:  You were on more than Esther Willams, who was on four times.

    CARLIN:  [laughs]  Well you can only roll out that swimming pool so many times.

    KAZ:  Ed must have really liked you.

    CARLIN:  Well I was an Irish Catholic kid from New York.  He
    actually said to my manager once--usually they cut the comedian’s time
    between dress rehearsal and air on Sunday--usually the manager has to
    go in to see Ed and he’ll say tell him to cut two minutes; the monkeys
    went long, ya know.  My manager swears this is true, more than one
    time he went in there with Ed and Ed would say [in Sullivan voice]
    “Well now, I know George is doin’ about six-and-a-half minutes
    now.”  It was the time for him to say he was gonna cut me. And he
    said, “Now George is an Irish Catholic boy, isn’t he from New
    York?”  “Yeah.  Corpus Christie Parish.”  “Corpus
    Christie?  Up there near Columbia University. Yeah yeah.  OK
    well you just tell him to do a good show there.”  And he didn’t
    cut me!  And it seemed to be related to my ethnicity and my
    religion.  You know, Bob (Carlin’s manager) said it wasn’t just
    kinda happenstance.  It seemed connected the first time it
    happened.

    KAZ:  So it comes in handy to play the Irish Catholic card sometimes.

    CARLIN:  Ah, ya never know.  Ya never know.

    KAZ:  You also appeared many many times on the Mike Douglas Show.  Do you think Mike really got what you were doing?

    CARLIN:  Well, I was always on there at the beginning of my
    career, 1965, 66, and 7.  Mike Douglas was one of my
    mainstays.  And at that time there wasn’t anything to be figuring
    out.  I mean I was a mainstream comic and I had the “Hippy-Dippy
    Weatherman” in there who was clearly a pothead.  But you could
    also write him off as sort of a hipster who was out of it, ya
    know?   So I don’t know what he thought. 

    Later on when
    I went through my changes and his show was in another incarnation--it
    might have been out in Hollywood by then--I did his show, and John
    Lennon and Yoko Ono had me on.  They were his co-hosts for a
    week.  But I don’t know that he bothered much about that kind of
    stuff.  He probably understood the world was changing and that
    this guy had changed along with it.

    KAZ:  Laurel and Hardy or Abbott and Costello?

    CARLIN:  Well, in childhood Abbott and Costello were the two guys
    for me.  But I found out later that it was kind of immature. 
    I didn’t realize that that was true.  Like Red Skelton was another
    comic who was too immature for me later on.  Laurel and Hardy were
    more of a classical team.  I’m not really big on Laurel and Hardy,
    but I understand why they’re considered so highly rated.  That was
    really artistic stuff they did, ya know?  Abbott and Costello, I
    think it was a little less classy.  It was more, rowdy, sloppy.

    KAZ:  Recently I was watching the first season of “That Girl” on
    DVD.  You appeared in one episode as Marlo Thomas’s manager. 
    On the commentary track, someone said “George did one episode, and then
    he just disappeared.”  What happened there?

    CARLIN:  That was part of that manifestation of being in (the)
    main stream and feeling I had to do acting, you know, in sitcoms. 
    And if I got in as a regular in a sitcom it would’ve been great. 
    You know, her manager.  I thought as easily as (comedy) came to
    me, acting would come to me.  But it did not.  It was very
    frightening, because there were so many instructions all at once. 
    First of all, I had my lines memorized, but you’re terrified that
    they’re not, but you keep going over them in your mind.  But
    that’s one thing.  They’ll always say “OK. Let’s do that
    again.”  But after the rehearsal of the scene with blocking, then
    they come to you and say stuff like, “You’re coming down the stairs,
    the phone is ringing at the bottom of the stairs.  You hesitate a
    moment because you’re not sure if that’s your wife or your ex-wife.”
    They throw s*** at ya.  “And then when Marlo comes in make sure
    you’re not in Marlo’s light and come a little faster with that line.”
    None of that was part of what I had in mind.  All I knew was to
    say the words.  And so I was completely fearful. 

    That was
    when I started realizing that this is not for me.  First of all,
    I’m not gonna be hired, based on how bad I am.  And I took acting
    coaching from a couple of people, ya know, but that doesn’t mean s***.
    You either become an actor, I think, or you’re not.  I had no
    technique.  I had no training to fall back on.

    KAZ:  Well you did much better than Rich Little.  He was in
    an episode where they had a computer date.  I thought you did much
    better than him.

    CARLIN:  Good!  I’m proud of that.

    KAZ:  Well at least ya got that goin’ for ya, right George?

    CARLIN:  Yeah.  Absolutely.  I’ll bring that up next interview.

    KAZ:  What is the absolute worst gig you ever had?

    CARLIN:  Worst gig I ever had, my partner and I, Jack Burns was my
    partner for two years, and we made about five hundred a week generally
    in the Playboy Clubs and four hundred a week in other types of
    nightclubs.  We worked six night weeks, sometimes two weeks at a
    time and we got a gig in Flint, Michigan at the Palace Gardens, which
    in essence was really a bar with a dance floor that had acts some of
    the time, apparently.  And there was jukebox up on the stage and
    we did very smart sophisticated material for its time.  We were in
    that new wave of comics in the early sixties.  I did an impression
    of Mort Sahl. I did an impression of Lenny Bruce.  We did a
    beatnik bit.  We did stuff that had a little bit of bite. A little
    bit of social tinge to it.  And we came into work that night and
    the bar was all lined up with people in their work clothes, like cement
    workers and construction guys and shit.  And sitting at the tables
    was, like, a softball team that had just come back from practice or a
    game or something.  And we had to do a f****** show with our
    stuff.  And during one of the nights, someone went up and turned
    on the jukebox during our act.

    KAZ:  And what was the first gig where you thought to yourself, “Wow.  This is going to work for me.”

    CARLIN:  No. There were plenty of nights where everything works
    fine and those are the nights that you counted on when things didn’t go
    well.  If I did something in Greenwich Village and didn’t go over
    well on a Friday night, I would just remember the last Friday
    night.  If Saturday sucked I would say “Last night was
    great.”  It’s always the audience.  You have to carry that
    around in your head.  It’s always their fault.

                                                                                            ------ Ed Kaz !

May 14, 2008

  • "Ya gotta know when to hold 'em..."

    Time now for yet another episode of that high concept/low-rent reality series editor UN editeddetailing the day-to-day dealings of Rich the New York City Reality TV Editor.

    EPISODE 67: "GUAM"
    Producer Chuck wants to look at some disks but there's a big problem.
     
    Tune in next time for ANOTHER EXCITING EPISODE of editor UN edited on most of these Xanga stations.

    Credits:
    Chuck :  Such a jokester.
     

    We welcome your comments and suggestions!
    Please print neatly and legibly in the spaces provided below.
    Thank you,
    The Producers of editor UN edited

    Filmed in KAZ-O-VISION®
    "Dark and Seedy"

May 13, 2008

May 12, 2008

  • ...and now THE FUN VERSION! See UPDATE!


    M
    ondayn
    color drain
    reverse brain
    against weekend grain
    feeling Cobain
    withhold refrain
    till after rain

                         ---Ed Kaz


    7th Ave, 7am NYC, 5.12.08

    UPDATE!

    Apparently I've been bumming everyone out with my poem this morning,  so I have decided to rewrite it in order to make it more fun!

    Mondayny!
    color drainy!
    reverse brainy!
    against weekend grainy!
    feel like Dick Cheney!
    withhold refrainy!
    till after the rainy!

                         ---Ed Kaz !

May 10, 2008

May 9, 2008

May 8, 2008

  • "...I have a soft spot for Herb Alpert. There's no doubt."

    A few years back I had the pleasure of interviewing Steve Earle for Goldmine Magazine.  Our conversation centered around record-collecting (which is what most of my real-life conversations center around).  The topic of guilty pleasures came up:

    Ed Kaz!:  Ever bought a record that you
    would never tell anyone you had?  Like Abba or Boston?

    Steve Earle:  No, I never bought ABBA or Boston.

    Ed Kaz!: How about Herb Alpert?

    Steve Earle:  I love Herb Alpert!  I don't think I've ever bought a Herb Alpert
    record, but they are records that I grew up on.  They were around, and you
    know, I started out playin' trumpet in junior high band during that period. 
    The other thing about Herb Alpert that's kinda cool is what they did with
    A&M.  They started a record label in their garage that grew up into a major
    label and did some very, very cool music.  So I have a soft spot for Herb
    Alpert. There's no doubt.

    Ed Kaz!:  Yeah.  The Tijuana Brass.  When all the documentaries about the sixties are
    put together, the soundtrack always has Buffalo Springfield, but why can't
    they throw in something from Whipped Cream and Other Delights?  That was
    selling more than those other albums.

    Steve Earle:  Yeah it was. That was a cool record. And there was a whole Latin thing
    goin' on that sorta came out of jazz because all the samba stuff was finally
    filtering north and jazz musicians got interested in that.  And the first
    band that A&M--well there was the Baja Marimba Band, which was just goofy--but I guess the second band that Herb Alpert and Jerry Moss signed was
    Sergio Mendez.  So those were pretty cool records too.

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    My sentiments exactly, Steve.

    Well friends, tonight is a big big night in the life of me. My longtime idol Herb Alpert is playing Joe's Pub in New York City and I am going to be there.  For me, Alpert was always The Man. The first records I bought as a kid were his records.  I picked up a trumpet in grade school because of him.  Never did I think I'd get to actually see this guy live.  That all changes tonight.

    This makes me very very happy; the kind of happy I feel whenever I hear a Herb Alpert song.

    Courtesy: The Kaz 45 Box.

                                                                    
    -----Ed Kaz

May 7, 2008

  • This one's for the ladies...

    Photo credit: Eddie Leibovitz

    Chuck Smith's shirt: 23rd Street Goodwill, NYC
    Jacket:  28th Street Goodwill, NYC
    Grooming:  New Doggie Daycare, NYC
    Pants: What pants?

    Ed Kaz's shirt:  Old Navy remainder bin
    Jacket: Found it in the subway
    Grooming:  Lawn Doctor, Freehold NJ
    Eyewear:  Pedro Cardin, Perth Amboy, NJ