February 9, 2016

  • PUNXSUTAWNEY PHIL ANNOUNCES BOYCOTT OF GROUNDHOG DAY APPEARANCE

    By Ed Kaz Amalgamated Press

    Punxsutawney (AP)

    Punxsutawney Phil announced Thursday that he would not participate in the upcoming Groundhog Day event scheduled for February 2nd, escalating his off-and-on feud with Meerkat Kelly and throwing the future of spring prediction into turmoil.

    “I refuse to come out of my hole as long as Meerkat Kelly is there,” said an agitated Phil on a call-in talk radio program this morning.

    Yesterday the famed marmot tweeted “I refuse to call Meerkat Kelly a bimbo, because that would not be politically correct. Instead I will only call her a lightweight mongoose!”

    Meerkat Kelly had recently raised the ire of Punxsutawney Phil after calling him out on his disparaging comments about meerkats’ burrowing habits.

    Phil says he has scheduled a petting zoo event in Pittsburgh to counter the festival.

    "Talk to the paw!"