July 23, 2011
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BREAKING: ABE VIGODA DISCOVERED ALIVE by Ed Kaz! Amalgamated Press
NEW YORK--Abe Vigoda, the actor whose career ranged from The Godfather to Barney Miller, has been discovered alive in his Upper-East Side apartment this morning. According to AP, at 8:31 am, Vigoda’s body was found breathing, sitting up, eating a spinach knish, and watching ESPN.
A source close to the actor says no service is planned. The source quotes Vigoda as saying, “Because I’m still f**king alive! Can I finish my f**cking knish now?”
Comments (7)
Still Betty White is refusing his phone calls.
LOLOLOL
Poor Abe . . . he has been battling this whole living thing for so long.
The state is evil.
If you obey its laws, you too are evil.
How will you justify yourself? What crimes have you committed today?
Extend an appropriate homily to his family for me, willya?
@darkoozeripple - I removed a tag prematurely.
@Ed_Kaz - I have hope for you my brother; you are not yet a lost cause.
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